41. Rebuilding

OK, so some of you know already, but before I finished treatment last year, I signed up for a 10k. It might not sounds like much, especially given that I’ve run plenty of these before. But I haven’t publicised that I’m doing this because, in all truth, I wasn’t sure I’d be able to do it.

A friend recently posted about how tough it is rebuilding after radio- and chemotherapy, and she’s right. However strong you appear on the outside, your body’s taken a beating and isn’t as strong as it was. Chemo is poison, radiation is toxic, surgery is traumatic, and that’s just the physical stuff – the mental impact is a whole different kind of beating.

So for me, this time, running a 10k isn’t just about putting one foot in front of the other, having the stamina or the strength. It’s about belief – and in complete contrast to the belief I had during treatment, until recently I didn’t know if I’d be able to do it. I just didn’t want to run. I still don’t! Every time I go out, I’m scared to death of having to stop half way round. I’m worried I won’t be able to do it, which seems stupid to me, because I know I’ve done it before! But my body’s been through quite a bit since then.

Last week, the friend I was planning to run with had to drop out through injury. And it made me realise that, although she’s not able to do this now, I am. I’ve got a great trainer helping me get my strength back physically, my distance is up to 8k, I have two weeks left to make up the difference, and I owe it to myself not to let this beat me. For God’s sake Rebecca; it’s a flipping 10k, not a marathon!

So I’m doing it. There, I’ve said it, no more hiding, I’m committed now!

Deep down, I’m doing this one for me. To prove to myself that I can do it. But if anyone wants to support me, it’ll make a huge difference 🙂

  • If you are in London on Sunday 4th February, come and shout at me (and the other crazy people who think a Winter Run is a good idea! – Lucy, Nia, Adrian…) I’ll post pictures on the day, but will probably be spottable in my signature pink Nike socks!
  • If you’re not in London, cheer me on via Facebook (I’ll track the run on my Nike Run Club app, so when anyone ‘likes’ the post, it’ll send cheers and applause into my headphones!)
  • Or if you have any pennies to spare, sponsor me, and help fund more of the groundbreaking research which saved my life last year… details here: http://www.justgiving.com/boxysboobjob.

In advance, thank you – you guys rock xx

PS – if anyone wants to actually run it with me, let me know as Claire’s place it up for grabs!

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